Moments. We all have them. Right? Somehow when we're in them it seems like we'll be in that space forever. So we rush them. Or better yet, we attempt to preoccupy ourselves so that we don't feel them. I'm learning that if you don't stop and feel what you need to feel , you'll never quite get out of those spaces and move on to the next thing. Those feeling will hang over your head until you really confront them.
It's been a year and a half since I made the decision to leave the workforce and support myself via my own creative projects. I've learned so much about who I am. I know now that when I get stressed , I shut down. Completely. Recently, I'd gotten to the point where I allowed the pressure to build up so much that I froze. Literally. I feel like I went into hiding. Everything stopped. I stopped creating regularly. I stopped being social. I stopped feeling like I was moving forward. And for a little while I was really down on myself about it. You don't really take into account the emotional roller-coaster that becoming a creative entrepreneur is before you start the ride. I guess I thought that once I made the decision, everything would get better and better. It doesn't work like that. You're up , then you're down , then you're up again.
WHAT I'VE LEARNED:
- You must take care of yourself - mind , body , and soul - more than ever. Your work depends on it.
- Be kind to yourself. Be mindful of what you say about you. You need encouragement, not criticism.
- There's nothing wrong with needing a break. Taking time to regroup is completely necessary and completely ok. Sometimes we need our time. Time to turn off. Time to think. Time to just be who we are.
- IT'S OK TO BE SAD. IT'S OK TO BE UNSURE. IT'S OK TO BE STILL. Feel what you need to feel so that you can move on.
BACK TO BASICS :
I found that doing what I love and sticking around people with good energy helped . As a creative, it's inspiring to be around people who love creating as much as you do. I had the opportunity to shoot with my friend, and very talented photographer Bryon Summers in my hometown of Newark, NJ a few weeks. I'm in LOVE with the photos he captured. The weather was beautiful. We walked, and talked about life , and enjoyed creating for the sake of creating, It was perfect. I got to rock out in this super dope sweater from Project Runway designer Char Glover , and literally got my swag back. =)
TO SUM IT UP:
Everything life throws at us is important. Some times are happier than others, but the down times are just as necessary as the good ones.
All Love All ways,